The Smashmouth Giants, Bumbling Chargers, Stumbling Packers, Week 1 Overreactions, and Guess the Lines With Cousin Sal

The Giants looked like a professional football team and played a great game, putting their quarterback in positions to succeed.

The Cowboys were totally unprepared, blew assignments, and had no adjustments from the coaching staff.

The Bengals got fortunate breaks because the Buccaneers made stupid plays and were super sloppy.

This might be an overreaction game because Tampa is a little better and could have won if not for turnovers.

The Texans' defense was the most disappointing unit, and they have to be great for the team to go far.

Josh Allen had a classic game with multiple superhero plays, and the Texans' late sack and fumble cost them.

This was an abominable loss for the Packers, with insane penalties and no adjustments from LaFleur.

The Vikings blitzed 78% of the time and picked up pressure, exposing the Packers' offensive line.

The Chargers had egregious coaching mistakes, bad missed assignments, and couldn't get stops.

The Cardinals rallied behind Brissett and played with a chip on their shoulder, making this a potential overreaction game.

Derrick Henry is physically dominant at 32 and could be the greatest older athlete if he maintains this for three more years.

Daniel Jones looked like he was recovering from a major injury, with no rushing production and a punchless offense.

The Bears' offense was so good they might be the best NFC North team, even though the defense gave up 478 yards.

Ben Johnson might sell out the defense to break the points record, and the Bears need 34 points a game to do it.

The Lions struggle unless they score 35 points in the fourth quarter, and Gibbs' 35 touches are unsustainable.

The Saints ran the worst two-point conversion play of the year, and their secondary will be bad until players return.

The Eagles' offense isn't fixed, and Washington's receivers never seemed open, with McLaurin struggling.

Nobody has a good time during an Eagles game, and both fan bases are bummed out.

Malik Willis throws interceptions because none of the receivers can get open, and he throws into traffic.

The broadcast featured Chris Myers, and the receivers on both sides were the worst in a non-strike season.

The Steelers' offense was punchless, and Rodgers made decisions based on not wanting to get hit.

The game felt worse than the stats, and the Steelers' rushing attack was not explosive.

The Jets had an easy win but didn't get a turnover, extending their streak to 18 games without one.

Robert Saleh could be a first coach fired if the Jets start 0-9, and his nickname is Successful Semen Saleh.

Deshaun Watson for Offensive Rookie of the Year is dead, and Brock Bowers' 1,000+ yards bet is in jeopardy due to injury.

The Cardinals starting 0-5 bet is in trouble after they won, and the Rams' Super Team hype was a bad sign.

The Bills should be favored against the Lions, and the Texans-Bengals game is a semi-must-win for Houston.

The Bears-Vikings line should be higher due to the Bears' offense, and the Chargers-Raiders game is tricky.

His wife is worried about the college housing location and a neighborhood tweaker, but he thinks it builds character.

Getting a rescue dog is the right thing to do, but puppies are harder to train and could cause divorce.