CFB Week 1 Chaos With Andy Staples, Western Michigan HC Lance Taylor, Who's Back Of The Week + Max Is Back From His Honeymoon With Gifts

UMass beating Rutgers was a shit pumping, sad day for the birthplace of college football.

Rutgers paid UMass 1.55 million dollars to come into Piscataway and win the football game.

The official explanation from the Big Ten is that there is a secret clock that we did not get to see on TV, and on that secret clock, there was actually an extra second left.

If it was Western Michigan, there's no chance in hell that they would have spent that much time trying to find a second for Western Michigan to throw another pass.

The Big Ten screwed up by not releasing the instant replay deliberations in real time, which would have earned the public's trust.

The Big Ten officials sent a video from the review booth showing audio and slow-motion evidence, but the explanation doesn't match the video board clock.

Bryce Underwood looked so overmatched from the get go, and his mechanics and the offense were bad.

If Bryce Underwood doesn't take a massive step forward, Michigan is closer to a seven-five team than a playoff team.

There is a chance Michigan tries backup Tommy Carr against Oklahoma if Underwood struggles again.

Ohio State holding Senior Night in Week 1 is crazy because they're basically saying they don't want it to be the Michigan game.

Week One makes more sense than the third to last week because everyone is healthy and you win.

Oregon looked not great against Boise, which might be more credit to Boise being tougher than we thought.

Oregon is going to be fine and will likely beat Oklahoma State, but Boise State is probably pretty good.

LSU looked like one of the best teams in the country, dominating Clemson in the run game.

Lane Kiffin is the greatest troll in college football and perfect for the sport's drama.

This is rock bottom for Dabo Swinney, and the offense looked discombobulated with a bad scheme.

Dabo will likely stay until he is paid out or forced out, similar to Bobby Bowden's decline at Florida State.

Tua Tagovailoa is going to be the starter for the Falcons.

Having to start Tua to begin an NFL season in 2026 feels like a fantasy punishment.

Roger Goodell's contract extension runs through March 31, 2031, and he will be making 65 million annually.

Jerry Jones said there is no succession plan in place for the Cowboys.

He is confused about what day it is because of the time difference between the US and Australia.

There is an internal investigation going on for inappropriate relationships between staffers and potential drug use from some of the coaches. Steve Belichick and Mike Lombardi have left the team.

Jerry drafted a completely lopsided roster with zero running backs and has locked me out of the team.

Jerry messed up by not realizing Travion Henderson was injured and might not start.

Eating 100 burgers is the least consequential, dumbest, and most regrettable thing I have ever done.

The Big Ten needs to show instant replay deliberations in real time to earn the public's trust.

Bryce Underwood's physical talent got him out of jams in high school, but it doesn't work at the college level.

LSU looked like one of the best teams in the country and should be the one seed.

Oregon will probably beat Oklahoma State and pop back into the projected playoff.

Dabo Swinney is facing a long, slow decline similar to Bobby Bowden's lost decade at Florida State.

Clemson's new administration may eventually have an awkward conversation and pay Dabo a large check to leave.

Jeremiah Smith could be the Heisman winner if he catches three touchdown passes against Texas. Sam Leavitt could be a Heisman candidate if Lane Kiffin unlocks his potential like he did with other quarterbacks.

Our sideline rushed the field and celebrated, but the refs stopped us and said the game was under review. The Big Ten sent a video from the review booth, but the explanation doesn't match the video board clock.

Our goals are still on the table; we can still win the MAC and run the table. Grit is how we live and train, and our team has found ways to win close games over the last two years.

I went to France and Italy for two weeks and brought back gifts like Prada socks and sweatpants.